Predicting the Heat’s-A-Coming

I’m to lazy to go and look up the temperatures from last May, but I feel like we’re getting off easy this year temperature wise. I have a feeling these relatively mild weeks are going to quickly come back and bite us in the ass.

I’m predicting that we get our first sustained heat not this week but next week.  This week will be the last week of the nice mild weather.   I’m just going on a hunch that next week is going to be the official beginning of the balls hot weather.

Of course, I have absolutely no scientific data to back that up.  It’s just a feeling.

As with everything on the subway, I get really jumpy when things go too well for too long.

Being able to leave home without a jacket and not sweat my ass off on the platform is delightful.  But I’m used to only being able to do that for a few days a year.

Now, remember SUBWAYblogger’s three day theory.  It takes a full three days for the temperature underground to totally catch up to the outside temp.  One day of 98 degree weather won’t do anything down below.  We need three back to back days in the mid eighties for it to become totally unbearable underground.

I’m really not looking forward to the heat in the subway this year, not that I would any year.  This year particularly though.  There’s a really distinct smell of urine ripening at my stop that just gets worse by the day.  I can only imagine what the heat is going to bring.

There’s clearly some homeless guy that keeps making a daily deposit there because there’s no way that one quick piss could be persistent this long.  That ammonia smell is getting pretty ridiculous.  It’s almost to the point where you can taste it.  I’m considering walking all the way to the other end of the platform from now on.

Anyway, mark my words.  Heat’s a comin’.

I Fought with a Bum Today

Sort of.  Also, it turns out you can’t blog about it on your Blackberry while you are in the process of screaming at a scrawny bum.

Anyway, this morning it was raining pretty hard as we all know.  On my train, there was an open window that obviously had water leak down it and formed a puddle in one of the seats.

Unfortunately, I found myself standing directly in front of that seat.  I didn’t want the seat, but saw the open space.  So I spent much of the ride trying to explain to old ladies that they couldn’t sit there because of the puddle, as they pushed me out of the way.

About half way to my stop, a skinny a-hole homeless guy got on the train screaming .  F-this and F-that. Screaming at random people to get the f out of his way.  What are they looking at.  Then telling women he could see down their tops.  A real specimen.

Little eagle-eye spotted the open seat and squirmed his way though the packed train car where I (and others around me) said the seat’s wet.  Note:  I’m standing almost close enough for my shins to touch the front edge of the seat, that’s how packed the train is.  I’m at mid car, near the middle doors.  The wet seat is one spot in from the end of the bench.

So he comes in from my left and reaches down to the seat and brushes the puddle of water off the seat onto the front of my pants!  Like a big, fast wiping action to flick the water off.  He only got about half of the water off the seat when he started to spin around to sit down.

At first I was in shock, but then I said, “Are you fucking kidding me?”

I will leave the rest to your imagination.  I don’t want to go into any details, but he was not on board the train when we left the next station.

I have a fairly high tollerance for these guys because clearly they have mental problems.  However, when you are saying things like he said and splashing water on me, it really gets to the point where action needs to be taken.