Close, but No Cigar

WARNING:  This is a poo related story, using some poo humor.  It is a true story, but thought you should be warned.

Ok, this has absolutely nothing to do with the subway, but it was so unreal, I had to share it.

So I took a little trip to Shake Shack in Madison Square Park this afternoon.  Had a couple brewskies before getting there, and had to make a tinkle.

Luckily, they have that fancy new electronic pay toilet there.  I was so pumped.  I had seen it on TV, but never had the pleasure of partaking in the experience.

So there was a line.  Only two people in front of me.

An older man went in and took his time.  Not obnoxiously long, but long.  Maybe he couldn’t find the button to get out of there.  Who knows.

Anyway, there was a woman in front of me with her boyfriend.  She was doing the pee pee dance which was funny because I’ve never seen a 30 year old do that.  Anyway, there was a clear look of desperation in her eye.

Well, the door opened, and the man emerged, but no relief for the woman.  Why?  The rinse cycle.  The entire bathroom gets a spraydown between each use.  The door closes.

Well, she inches over to the control panel where you insert your 25 cents.  Still dancing.



I look back over to see that she is literally crapping her shorts.  Right before my eyes.  A grown, normal looking woman has poo falling from her shorts onto the sidewalk.  Read More »

Is it the beginning of the end?

I’m about one or two more back to back track fires away from taking cover in a bunker somewhere.  Seriously.  Things over the past couple weeks are just getting crazy.

It all started with summer showing up light a white hot freight train.  For weeks, we enjoyed beautiful mid 70’s each day.  Then, overnight it was 96 degrees outside…or 104 if you follow that “Real Feel” bullshit.

**Side note.  What the hell is a “Real Feel” temperature or heat index?  I know what it really means, but lets just make it easy.  Just tell me how damn hot it feels outside and leave it at that.  If it’s 86 outside but feels like 94, I want to know about the 94.  Screw the 86…who cares.  My ass is sweating.

Anyway, the heat showed up, and I started to brace for the subway heat as we’ve discussed at length in the past.  Interestingly, it was virtually the same day it hit as last year.  Also, we’ve discussed that it takes about a day or two for the heat to make it’s way underground.  Then it’s an oven.

So yeah, of course I was expecting the heat eventually, but not all this other crap.

Let’s start with the track fires.  It’s so damn hot that shit just randomly catches on fire on the PATH train tracks almost every week.  Switches, lights, and boxes in the subway blow up or short out.  How hot is it?  Hot enough to bring mass transit to it’s knees.

If there’s ever been an argument for better maintenance of the subway system (including upgrades), this is it.   Gas is hitting $5.00 a gallon all around us, more and more people are taking the trains, and we’re running a system from 1932.  Just wait and see how f-ed up it gets when the rain comes…

Then, there was last night.  I’m sitting in my apartment, and it’s perfectly quiet outside.  All of a sudden it sounds like rocks are being thrown at my windows.  I look outside, and it looks like a tornado is coming up the block.  I watches as a whole tree across the street became uprooted.

Then on the other side of the street, scaffolding started ripping off my neighbor’s building.  You know the scaffolding they put over the sidewalks?  Most usually have blue plywood walls put up around the first story of the scaffold.  Well, this wind started peeling off the 4×8 sheets of plywood like post-it notes.  They flew up the street doing cartwheels over the cars on the block. Read More »

Hudson Rail Yards Deal is Dead

The $1 billion deal for the Hudson Rail Yards development project is all of a sudden DEAD.

The deal fell through at some point late Thursday.  Apparently…

“…an “impasse” over zoning and the timing of payments, the rail yards’ owner said Thursday.” [Newsday]

So a big failing grade for the rail yard, as Gothamist puts it.  See their pictures of the development plans.

In case you’ve missed it, the Hudson Rail Yards were supposed to be developed into massive apartment buildings, a park, and more.  Bloomberg was also a big supporter.

Well, there goes that money too.  Lovely.

MTA: “Fellas…where’d that $3 billion go?”

That’s what the MTA is saying these days when they look at the capital improvement budget.  There’s a gaping $3 billion hole smack in the middle of the budget responsible for general repairs and maintenance of the transit system.

Yep.  $3 Billion.  Oops.

“The [CAPITAL] program has some shortfalls in it,” Metropolitan Transportation Authority CEO Elliot Sander said at an agency board meeting. [AMNY]

Uhhh yeah, “shortfall” is an understatement.

While mega-projects like the Second Avenue subway are not affected, the “nitty-gritty” work of station repairs and upgrades, signal replacements, or purchase of new cars could suffer, said MTA spokesman Jeremy Soffin. {AMNY]

You know, just the minor things like repairs, and track signals.  And really, how badly do we really need working brakes?

Adios Pope Benedict!

Now, our lives can get back to normal. The Pope’s visit to NYC has caused some all around travel issues. If you were planing to go anywhere on the East side this past week, you were probably out of luck at many times.

No matter how you planned to travel, including by rail, there were rolling closures, frozen zones, and delays.

So now lets get back to normal!

Anyone have any good Pope stories?

Subway Crush Facilitates Subway Lovin’

Remember that guy that saw a girl on the subway and fell in love with her immediately? Or perhaps you remember feeling a little nauseous when you read the story. Logo

Well now there’s a brand new site that allows you to get stalked find your missed subway love connection. is a new site that simply allows you to post a quick note about the person you saw in hopes that maybe they will see it and respond.

The little post lines remind me of a Twitter thread. They are just quick one-liners. However, in this case, they are organized by subway line.

It’s an interesting concept. Already has a few dozen posts.