Back Off

Can I just say that the women who leap over people to dive on an open seat need to freaking relax. I mean seriously.

Ok here’s the profile of the people I generally speak of:

18-34 Years Old
Usually White
iPod Wearing

The skinny aspect is critical to the scenario because these women jump at even the smallest seat. There could be a sliver of seat showing between two fairly large people, and these women will knock people over to get it.

Anyway, I generally don’t sit. I stand for the whole ride unless it happens to be a really slow transit day. Even when I am literally standing in front of an open seat, and I wont take it because there’s going to be someone that either needs it more or wants it more than me. So I generally move out of the way.

So if you want the empty seat in front of me, all you gotta do is ask me to move so you can get by me. There’s no need to duck under my arm and slam me in the ribs with your hug purse.

Side note, when the shit you are carrying is bigger than your lap, you can’t hold it on your lap or attempt to navigate a crowded train. Just stand where you’re at, and don’t move. Above all else, don’t get pissed when people bump into you because you have a 50 cubic foot purse.

20 thoughts on “Back Off

  1. Women seemed to be taking the lead in many areas on life: education, business, science. This might be the beginning of an aggressive attitude to achieve their spot in society. Watch out!


  2. Amen to that. Especially the part about huge purses. I carry a computer bag to/from work everyday and it never touches anyone or takes up excessive space… how come women with those massive purses can’t manage to keep theirs from taking up extra room in the subway or knocking into people?


  3. I meet the first four criteria, but my purse is small. I like to get a seat when I can because standing makes me motion sick.

    However, I’m not going to ram anybody to get to one, and if someone beats me to a seat, oh well. I’ll just stand there and silently curse them in my head until I am distracted by something shiny.


  4. You forgot “keen eyesight”. They can spot an empty seat from the platform as the train pulls in. Once they eyeball it, they’ll push through anyone trying to exit the train in an effort to reach it!


  5. I am that girl. That is me. Except I usually smile and apologize, with an expression that seems to say “we’re all in this sardine can together!”

    truth is, i’m gettin’ that seat, motherfucker. if you are that idiot who’s staring blankly and blocking the one free seat in the car, well, move over.


  6. Hey hey hey. SB is right. It gets annoying have someone with a bad tude push you to the side w/o any notice just to sit. Im not saying that only that type of woman/person does this, alot of people do. It’s clearly annoying. Personally, I do not sit either. Maybe once in a while but usually im the curly haired chick leaning on the door or holding the middle pole. I like to go unnoticed in the corner. 🙂


  7. I’m with you, Patrick. They make a mad dash for any seat, regardless of how little room there is or what obstacles are in there way


  8. i am the skinny white bitch who wants to sit because i have a loooong ride. no matter how you slice it and dice it, the bench seats in the e train cars hold 6 normal sized people. if some abnormally large creature tries to squeeze next to me in a space clearly too small for it’s bulk they will get quite the earful. i turn my ipod up REAL LOUD with headbanger music. don’t want to damage my own hearing so i simply let the earbuds dangle real close to the creature’s ear.


  9. In the interest of full disclosure:

    I have actually finger hooked a small Chinese woman by the back of her collar when she tried to dart past me onto a train.

    True story.

    Everyone looked at me like I was an asshole, like they didn’t secretly want to do the same thing. Pansies.


  10. I’m somewhat that girl also. Although, I have to stand up for myself, because I’m generally carrying 50 million bags due to being an art student, and also have a long ride from manhattan to brooklyn. So, yes, after a long day of walking and carrying shit, I want that little bit of seat. Thanks for standing. haha


  11. I’m that girl, although I am in closer to 35-36 and not super skinny. I have big time claustrophobia, and by sitting I can deal with it a lot better if the train ever stops. I have much more anxiety standing than sitting. So, there’s sometime a reason behind the aggressiveness. Also, some of these women may be pregnant but not showing yet….


  12. As a skinny chick that fits your description (minus the ipod part,) I have to disagree with you and agree with Patrick. The worst seat-pushing offenders are Asian men and women. I have been two-handed shoved countless times as they rush into the train (as if it is the last train that will ever pass thru the station) for seats. The only times I will shove for a seat is when I see one of the aforementioned offenders trying to dash to one – it gives me a kind of sick pleasure to beat them to the punch.


  13. Have you ever been on the N train? Hmmm, it’s funny that I fit your description, yet I’ve lost count of the times I’ve been shoved and stepped on by Chinese men and women at both Canal Street and several stops in south Brooklyn. I do not shove for seats but if I’ve been standing longer than you have and you take a seat that I’ve been eyeing, you better believe I will give you dirty looks and mutter something rude. The utter lack of common courtesy and manners in this city has turned subway travel into warfare. Come prepared for battle, otherwise stick to cabs or the express busses.


  14. I’m that girl, although I am in closer to 35-36 and not super skinny. I have big time claustrophobia, and by sitting I can deal with it a lot better if the train ever stops. I have much more anxiety standing than sitting. So, there’s sometime a reason behind the aggressiveness. Also, some of these women may be pregnant but not showing yet…

    Whoa. Just because you are clautrophobic doen’t mean you deserve a seat more. If anything, it’s a case for not riding the subway at all.

    Pregnant woman who aren’t even showing dont need to sit. Hell, many late term women dont even need to sit.

    Seats should be first come, first served…period. And their shouldn’t be any shame in having the seat before anyone else. If you choose to give it up to someone else, fine. But you should feel obligated to give it up because someone else thinks they are more deserving.


  15. Well I fit description very well..especially the skinny part thanks! I honestly don’t know what train you have been riding, but I have never cut someone off for a seat-ever! Unless, you are Asian of course and if you are true New Yorker, then you will know exactly what I am talking about. But, from the looks of this blog-it doesn’t seem like you are. First of all why are you standing in front of an empty seat? This is why people can’t all fit on train! Sit in the seat, and then offer it to someone when they need it.

    I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I have gotten up for a pregnant woman, someone with crutches, an elderly person, even someone with their child. I suggest you re evaluate your train conditions and get back to us when your story is legit!


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