Author: subwayblogger

Odd Subway Sex Assault

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Note to self ladies:  Don’t pass out drunk on the subway platform and expect not to be felt up.

Jasiri Walloe, 32, was arrested early Friday after the brazen assault, cops said.

Walloe found the victim passed out on a bench at 5 a.m. at the Brooklyn Bridge station, police said. He allegedly began kissing and fondling the intoxicated woman.

When a No. 6 train pulled in, Walloe scooped her up and carried her aboard. Walloe took her off the train at Spring Street, cops said.

Another rider grew suspicious and followed the two off the train. Walloe took the woman into a vestibule at 214 Mulberry St. where he removed her shorts and underwear, police said. He then fondled and molested her, waking her up, police said. Walloe allegedly began to bolt, but was caught a short distance away by police who had been called by the witness.

–From the NYP

Yeeeeeeah…weird.  First of all, what the hell are you doing passed out at a subway stop at 5am?   What happened to your friends?  Your drunk ass totally got ditched.  It was probably to the point where no one wanted to deal with you sh*t anymore.  But I bet they didn’t think you were going to get raped.

How drunk do you have to be to not wake up while being carted off onto a subway train, then taken into a vestibule, stripped naked, and fondled?  By the way, what the hell is a subway vestibule?  Are there secret rooms or spaces I was unaware of?

I’m not saying she had it coming, but people need to stop being idiots.

She is on the Pill

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The Planned Parenthood ads crack me up. The funniest is the one with the girl outside near a bridge. In great big letters above her:

“I’m on the pill.”

Hahah. She must be desprate for modeling gigs. Who wants to be the birth control slut with your picture plastered on subways all over Manhattan?

What if she actually lives in NYC. Imagine seeing her sitting on the train! There she is. There’s her picture. There she is. There’s her picture.

I can just see the conservatives saying “what a whore” in the back of their minds…even though it is just an ad campaign.

Just the idea or the name “Planned Parenthoot” makes some people uncomfortable. It just makes me laugh that now it’s in their faces on the subway. Haha.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .

NYC 4th of July Madness

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Macy’s FireworksDid you venture to the Lower East Side last night for fireworks?  Remember your umbrella?   Well, SUBWAYblogger did.

It wasn’t bad getting there really.  We transferred at Times Square and took the downtown N train.  Not much waiting time at around 7:30pm.  Took that down to 23rd Street.

Since we got there a little ahead of schedule, there was plenty of time for a pit-stop at Shake Shack.  Here’s where the rain helped.  There was virtually no line whatsoever at the Shack.  That’s unheard of this time of year.  There’s always a line.  On average, we usually wait at least 45 minutes.  The light rain had driven everyone indoors I guess.  There were only about 10 people in front of us.  (For you Shack regulars, thats just past the point in line where you step up onto the gravelly part…past the menu sign.)

After a Shack Burger and Summer Peach custard, it was off to FDR.  Got there in plenty of time and got an excellent spot for viewing.  That was another advantage of the rain.  I can’t even imagine what it would be like if it were actually nice out.  It actually started to come down pretty heavy at about 9pm (just 20 minutes before show time).   Luckily, it stopped just in time.

Good show…yadda yadda.

Then the trek back was…well…an adventure.  The part that sucks after a major event lets out is that you are subject to moving with the crowd.  The only way to avoid it is to leave early, and who wants to be that guy?

Ended up having to hoof it to the 14th Street station.  For some reason, the 14th Street station seemed 10 times farther away than it should have.  Anyway, the N train rolled up, and everyone made a dash for it.  Just as the last people squeeeeeeeezed on, a Q train pulled in.  I was near the outside, so I bailed to catch that express train just as the doors closed behind me.  I made it onto the express and even scored a forward facing seat.  Sweet!

Of course, my connecting train at 42nd Street took forever to get there.  It’s always the last leg that screws you.

On a side note, I’ve never seen so many subway maps out at the same time.  Every other person was a tourist or someone from out of town.  They had no idea where they were going.  You could also tell they were tourists because they thought they were entitled to “breathing room” on the packed train.  They looked mortified.

Turned out the lights

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Has anyone else noticed a lot of trains with lights turned off? It seems that many train cars lately have only had 25% of their cabin lights turned on.

There’s still the lights on in every doorway, but the rest are off.

It’s like when the train car temporarily loses power, and the main lights kick off. Only this time, they don’t come back on at all. Everything else is normal. The air conditioning and speakers work.

Maybe they are doing it on purpose to save power. It makes sense. You can still see very well on the trains even without the main lights. I bet if all the trains turned off half of their internal lights, it would save a ton of electricity.

Then again, maybe I give the powers that be too much credit.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .

You can tell it is a holiday week

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Where the hell is everyone? Not that I’m complaining, but I thought today might still be the weekend. There’s no one on the train this morning.

Not only did I get a seat, but there were even some left over! It’s like living in an alternate universe.

This must be what it’s supposed to be like if there were more trains, faster trains, that ran on time! This would be wonderful if it happened all the time.

Somehow, I even got into a car that has strong air conditioning!

Yeah, this is way to strange for a Monday, but I’ll take it. We can have 4th of July every week!

Thi train I’m on even seems to be running ahead of schedule. We are cruising down the line. Very little wait time at each stop since there aren’t many people to pick up in the first place. This ride that normally takes 20 minutes is going to be cut to 12 minutes. That’s awesome…especially since I’m running late. Shhh.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .

iPhone Birthday

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Today at 6pm Eastern, the iPhone goes on sale. SUBWAYblogger will actually be in the area of “The Cube” to witness the insanity.

The iPhone really is a dream toy for me since a majority of this blog is written remotely via Blackberry. I wonder how easy writing on it would be?

It would be sweet to have the “real Internet” on my phone too. It would be helpful for making other updates and changes when above ground. All the other functions would be fun to have too!

Unfortunately, I won’t be getting one any time soon. It’s complicated, but I would have to break my current contract. Also, it aint cheap! I don’t believe it is compatible with my work’s email setup either. Booo.

One day though. One day in the not to distant future.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .

BREAKING NEWS East Side Subways Shut Down

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The entire East Side has been shut down due to power outages.

The 4, 5, 6, E and V lines are shut down in all directions. A reported outage on the Upper East Side and/or Bronx has brought the East Side to a halt.

The intense storm in the area will likely not help things!

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

——

UPDATE (6:40pm):

All trains on the East Side are running locally only. There is no express service.

The 4 and 5 trains terminate at 86th Street.

CLICK HERE for delay details.

——

All trains running normal (for now).

What is the dirtiest subway station

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So here’s a question…what’s the dirtiest station in the subway system? Every regular rider knows a stop that just makes their skin crawl to think about it.

One I can think of is 96th and Broadway on the 1, 2, and 3. That stop is old and disgusting. It fills up like a toilet any time there is a good rain.

59th Street Columbus Circle used to not be too bad until they started destroying everything to remove the asbestos.

Most parts of the Grand Central subway are gross too. Mostly the main concourse. It just smells like homeless feet and ass. It looks pretty run down too. However, branches off of it like the walk to the S train are in fairly good shape.

Your thoughts???

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .

Poloshirts are heaven

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Guys that can get away with just wearing a poloshirt to work have no idea how lucky they are. While they have no problem dealing with the oppressive subway heat, the rest of us are dying a slow death in our suits.

The powers in charge that mandate full dress attire in the peak of summer are tools. Honestly, can we all just get together in the boardroom wearing some light weight kakis and polos or will that make Bob from accounting cry?

There’s no need! Besides, no matter how nice your suit is, it looks like shit after you’ve sweat through the ass of your pants.

Offices that require full business wear should provide full locker rooms for the men to store their clothes. That way, we can wear shorts and t-shirts to work, and change when we get there. Otherwise, the subway is going to kill us, and we haven’t even reached the hottest point of the year!

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .