Someone should let teenage guys with long hair know that they look gay. If they are gay, then I guess everything is cool. Otherwise, get your ass to SuperCuts.

If your hair covers your ears, you are the ones I am talking about. Take a look at some old Hanson videos. Do those fellas look cool? Uhhh NO. Slap some boobs on one of them and you’ve got a fairly decent looking chick.

As for the kid in front of me right now, if you flip your ratty hair in my face one more time, I may have to beat you. Everyone around us right now doesn’t believe that you are “with” that chick you are talking to.

Holy crap, you are wearing dog tags. Not even authentic looking ones either. Small crome ones. Yeah, you need your ass kicking quota bumped up. It is time for an intervention. Plus, we need to get those red Converse sneakers back to their rightful owner…in the late 80s.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

Now that the colleges are back in full swing, you notice lots of lost students in the system.

During the week, for the most part, they seem to have their act together. They’ve figured out how to get to class via subway, so they don’t often get lost. On Thursday and Friday nights, however, you tend to see them wander.

As soon as the weekend rolls around, they venture out to areas with which they are not as familiar. They are easy to pick out because the freshmen tend to travel in packs. The newer they are, the larger the pack.

The pack is always lead by one person that is the “New Yorker” who knows the way around. I use the term “New Yorker” loosely because it is usually some punk from Greenwich who calls himself a local.

There is a rogue Tuesday pack of coeds in front of me right now exhibiting all the tell-tail signs. Just a little strange to see them out at 6pm on a Tuesday. They probably had to go to a museum for class or something.

All together, they are ok right now since there’s been no boozin’ in the picture. Had this been a Friday night, it would have been reeeeal ugly.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

The month flew by! It is almost time to get a new MetroCard. It feels like I just got one though.

There’s always something a little depressing about getting a new MetroCard. SUBWAYblogger happens to be a monthly unlimited rider. I feel like it is the best buy since it is used at least twice every day of the week.

After buying it, feels like we are riding for free. The renewal day sucks though. Shelling out $78 at once is a bit of a drag.

Anyway, apparently, SUBWAYblogger isn’t the only one with a list of subway peevs. They caught the attention of a lot of blogs as well as our readers. There were some good comments and additions made after last night’s post.

Well, off to enjoy the cool fall weather.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

Finally, things seem to be back to normal on the subway. The platform was a little crowded, but there was plenty of room for people to get on.

I forgot to mention (actually, I ran out of time) on Thursday that I saw a girl fall out of the train. That’s right…fall out of the train. Don’t worry, it wasn’t moving or anything, but she did fall out.

She was about 18 years old or so with a large bookbag on. It was an absolute freak show on Thursday. Way to many people.

She was on the train before I got on. She was standing in the opposite doorway when we arrived at an express stop sometime later. A sea of people flooded the doors trying to get on. She held her ground for the most part, but then the moment of truth. The doors were left open an extra long time because there was a train ahead of us. More and more people tried to squeeze in. Eventually, some people started to yell at eachother that there was no more room.

Eventually, things got a little more quiet, and it happened. With a little yelp, she fell out as if the mash of people had burst. She fell backward out of the train. I think she had gone to move her footing and stepped into the gap by accident. The men closest to her stepped off to help her up, and then the doord closed. So, her and the three guys that got off to help her were left behind.

I was about 15 people deep with a view of the scene through the window. The lesson learned? Mind the gap and oversized backpacks can kill!

(Ok, the last part was a little much)

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

Photo: Not actually the girl that fell out of the train, but this is the exact possition she was in before being squeezed out.

No, I’m not Jewish, but I sure dig your holidays!

Both to and from work, it was a relaxed commute. There were far fewer people to battle with today. This morning almost felt like a Saturday morning!

Anyway, on to more interesting topics.

We’ve said it before and I think it is worth mentioning again. If you are to fat to only take up a single seat, then you do not get to sit. EVER. If you are that fat, you could use a little more time on your feet.

I managed to get a seat just a couple minutes ago. The seat to my left came open. Some fat b*tch waddled up and asked me I’d I could scoot to make a little more room.

I looked her square in the eye and said: NO.

I’m sorry, but I am a thin person enjoyinh my seat. You are welcome to sit next so me. However, I am not about to move over so that your ass can ooze into my seat.

If you want two seats, I want to see that you paid twice the regular fare.

Here’s an idea, instead of a fare hike, how about a “pay per pound” MetroCard? Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

I arrived on the platform today, and to my excitement, I thought the transit gods had smiled upon me.

This morning, there is no one on the train! A light crowd on the platform and only a few people standing on the train. There were even open seats!

Then it hit me: today is a Jewish holiday, Rosh Hashanah. I always new that there were a lot of Jews in NYC, but you really don’t notice until a Jewish holiday comes around. All of a sudden, you look up and you are one of 3 gentiles that showed up at work! Everyone else is out for the day.

Hey, I’ll take this any day. I guess if the rest of us need to go to work, a nice consolation prize is a stress free ride to work.

Will the afternoon ride be even less busy? We’ll have to wait and see…

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

The MTA Chairman, Peter Kalikow, says that he and staff will strongly oppose any fare hikes or service cuts. So that is good news for us. Hopefully, the money grubbing politicians will stay out of it and not force the proposal through.

“Now is simply not the time to reduce service to our commuters,” Kalikow said, pointing to the 36% increase in transit ridership during the past decade.

I wish I could say that the rider volume was lower today. I still believe they messed with the schedule because trains seem to be slightly less frequent.

The eastside gridlock issues should be pretty much over now. Unfortunately, I don’t think people know that. I think they assume that the streets would be closed all week, so they keep coming into the subway.

Yeah, this is definitley out of control. Right now, I feel like a sardine.  If this woman elbows me one more time, I might have to throw one back.

People act like this is the last train of the morning. If they don’t make it onto this one, they will have a meltdown. People, just wait for the next one. It will literally take 4 more minutes out of your life. Not the end of the world so GET A GRIP!

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…