The mystery of where all the kiddies have gone has been solved. They are all of in summer camp-like programs that must all start at the exact same time in the morning.

I get down to the train at virtually the exact same time every day. So usually, I see the same usual suspects. A couple weeks ago, all the high school age and younger kids seemed to have disappeared. Obviously, school’s out for summer…or at least it’s exam time.

Today, however, I was just a few minutes earlier to the subway. I’ve found all the missing children. There they were with their mothers in tow. They are all off to their summer finger paint and basket weaving classes. So now I know exactly what time to avoid the subway like the plague. Luckily, the kids window is plus or minus five minutes.

From all directions, they flooded toward the subway entrance. It was as if a bell rang in the neighborhood, sending the signal that it was time for them to board. It was a little scary because it was one of those, “wait a minute, what am I missing” moments.

So it shall only take me this one time to learn my lesson. It only takes one time to hear an entire ride’s worth of poopy jokes to know that there’s no way in hell I will get on the train at this time again. That, combined with shrill screams and morning temper-tantrums (not by me) have also solidified my desire to never have kids in this city.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

Nothing like major service delays to start your week off right. This morning is a morning is a morning of firsts.

To start, I saw a train pulling into the station from my viewpoint up near the token booth. I took my time because the platform didn’t seem crowded. I was also in no rush this morning, so I figured I would be all set. So, that train closed its doors just as I reached the platform. No biggie.

That was my first mistake.

So there I stood, waiting for the next train. Waiting. Waiting. More and more people show up. Still waiting. Getting a little crowded now. Yup, still waiting.

Then an announcement I’ve never heard before. “After an earlier incident, downtown local trains are running. The next train is AT LEAST 20 minutes away.”

I’ve never heard them give an honest time estimate before. It’s always a generic “service is delayed” thing they try to pass off. Yes, I am pissed about the delay, but at least I have a reference to make an alternative plan against.

So now it’s time to hoof it or look for a cab.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio…

Even though yesterday and today are fairly cool days, it takes a while for the subway to finally cool down. So, the air conditioning is still a must.

However, sometimes the AC breaks down on certain cars. Sometimes, it just gets shut off for no reason at all.

On those occasions, getting on to an air conditionless train car is like walking face first into New York’s smelly, hairy arm pit. Yummy.

There you are, expecting cool relief when you step aboard. Nope. Instead, warm, musty grossness that smells like 1978 plus every year since. That’s what I enjoyed this morning.

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .

So how about the new DEP/NYC Department of Health “Water” ads.  What the hell do they have to advertise city water for?  And for that matter, why are they advertising it on the subway?

Is there really competition for the water that comes into our apartments?  Don’t think so.

And let’s be honest, are you really going to compete with Coke and Pepsi on water sales?  There’s no way the city will ever be able to even nudge the marketing efforts of these major companies.  So they shouldn’t even bother trying to put city water up against bottled water. 
The ads are pretty trendy looking for a city organization though.  They actually caught my eye.  Then, I realized I was looking at an ad for water.  City water.

What are they going to advertise next?  “Call 911 for all your fire extinguishing needs.”  “Been mugged?  Try the NYPD.”

It’s gonna get crazy hot overnight. We’ve been kinda spoiled the last two days with the cool 70 degree weather. Tommorow, you’re going to wake up on the surface of the sun.

An immediate jump to the mid 90s (if not 100)! How’s that for a smack in the face?

Usually, there is a 24 hour delay on the temps in the subway system. So, it has just finally cooled down to match the street level temp. The increased heat *should* take a day to heat up the system. Hopefully, that will mean a tollerable Friday commute.

Nothing like sweating through all your clothes to start your day off right. Some days on the platform, I sweat from places I didn’t even know could sweat!

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .

Well, there’s no crazies on the train this morning…at least that I am aware of. And I didn’t see anything out of the ordinarty either.

So that’s usually when I start to look around the train a little carefully. The subway billboard ads are where I look first.

I’ve seen the School of Visual Arts ads before, and now I’m starting to appreciate them more. They themselves are interesting art works. I especially enjoy the one that has the pens, pencils, paintbrushes, etc attached to a computer mouse.

I also like their slogan, “How bad do you want to be good?” It’s kinda badass.

Anyway, the bigger point is that if you are going to spend an ass load of cash on buying subway ads, you better make the look good. There’s so many that just flat out suck. For example, just about all of the MTA’s ads. So if you are going to make me stare at your ad for my whole ride, you better make it memorable!

Live from the subway, back to you in studio… .